JE, Best Ninja Ever

Title: Best Ninja Ever
Unit for Points: Kis-My-Ft2
Word Count: 100
Characters/Pairings: Totsuka, Takizawa-tono
Author’s Notes: I always end up writing A.B.C.-Z as ninjas, lmao.

1: Best Ninja Ever
Totsuka Shota, Best Ninja Ever, does not want a ninja partner, does not need a ninja partner, and simply refuses to have a ninja partner.

“You work with Tsukada without complaint,” Takizawa-tono points out, still reading the report about his han’s crop production. “And Goseki. And Kawai. And even that new one from the next han over.”

“Yes, well.” Totsuka pauses. That’s different, though. “Well.”

“Well?” Takizawa-tono finally does look up.

Totsuka schools his face into an expression of respectful and honorable refusal. “Apologies, Tono. A partner simply will not match my wardrobe.”

Takizawa laughs. Hard.

Totsuka’s partner turns up the next day.

2: Employable Skillset
Hashimoto-kun is cute as a button, and Totsuka can see exactly how he got this job, because he’s also the worst ninja ever.

“Sorry, Totsuka-senpai,” he apologizes after tripping over his own tabi and sending himself sprawling on the tatami. Kawai and Goseki are delighted with Hashimoto, too much, which only makes Totsuka’s long-suffering headache intensify.

“It’s fine,” Totsuka says, helping Hashimoto pick up himself and then the bo. “Let’s pick these up, and then go stretch with Tsukada-kun. Properly, this time, hm?”

“Yes, Totsuka-senpai!” Hashimoto beams, all long limbs and willing smile.

Totsuka knows exactly how Hashimoto got this job.

3: Only Need One Trick
“No, really,” Totsuka asks during ‘remedial ninja school,’ as they’ve come to call their training sessions. Hashimoto doesn’t even take offense. “You passed the chunin exams? Really?”

“I studied really hard,” Hashimoto insists, the bells he’s supposed to be stealing silently jingling in his hands as he bounces on his heels a little.

“Hm. How many jutsu do you know?” Totsuka inquires.

“Just one?” Hashimoto admits, sheepish. “But it’s really good, watch!”

Hashimoto claps his hands together, cheeks puffed in concentration, then vanishes in a huge poof of lavender-colored smoke.

Totsuka is not surprised when Hashimoto reappears as a girl, smoke covering nothing.

4: Tottsu wo Mezashite
“The truth is,” Hashimoto’s voice is quiet in the darkness of night, a touch homesick, and even if Totsuka does not need or want a ninja partner, he doesn’t stop Hashimoto sliding his futon over until it’s touching his. “…it’s you.”

“What’s me?” Totsuka asks, vaguely curious. The others breathe deep and slow, worn out from chasing after Hashimoto all day.

“My aim, it’s you. I told Takizawa-tono I was gonna be your partner no matter what.”

Totsuka blinks. “My ninja partner?”

“Nope.” Suddenly Hashimoto’s futon is empty and Totsuka’s is at full capacity. “Wanna see the jutsu again?”

“No,” Totsuka surrenders, “I don’t.”

5: Learning Curve
Totsuka doesn’t give Hashimoto his way immediately, informing Goseki primly that’s not how anybody learns anything, but it only makes Hashimoto more determined. He trains harder and longer than any of them to catch up, ignoring the seeming impossibility of it. Even Kitayama from the next han over admits that Hashimoto’s come a long way.

Hashimoto crawls into Totsuka’s futon most nights, but falls asleep almost immediately, so Totsuka is surprised to return from a mission well past midnight and find Hashimoto wearing an expectant smile.

And nothing else.

“Takizawa-tono said you didn’t want me if I didn’t match your wardrobe.”

6: Best Ninja Ever x2
“There’s only so much a ninja can take,” Totsuka says with what remains of his dignity the next morning. It’s not a lot of dignity, since he can’t sit seiza as usual. Kawai and Goseki point and laugh themselves silly, along with Fujigaya from the next han over. Totsuka doesn’t see what the big joke is, since Fujigaya has more than a few idiot kouhai himself.

“Tottsu, Tottsu!” Hashimoto dashes in, bright-eyed and breathless, and then he falls to his knees next to Totsuka and spills two handfuls of bells into Totsuka’s lap, not a one of them making a sound.