Harry Potter, And Then There’s the After-Party

Title: And Then There’s the After-Party [James/Lily]
Rating/Warnings: PG
Summary: Lily is the Marauders’ first fangirl and also is going to murder Remus.
AN: Written for the 24-Hour Ficathon. Marks requested Lovemeonyourknees!James from SYWTTYARB.

And Then There’s the After-Party

“Hello, Evans!” James announced, sailing into the Common Room and stopping in front of the red-head. “How are you this fine evening?”

“NOT dateless for the Yule Ball!” Lily answered loudly and slowly, in case he was going to be particularly dense this evening. “So don’t even bother asking me!”

“That’s wonderful!” James said, without missing a beat.

“NO, I won’t…wait, what did you say?” Lily blinked.

“Since I’m in the band and all,” James continued.

“You’re WHAT?!” Lily demanded.

“Me, Sirius, Remus, and Peter,” he nodded happily, “we’re the band, hadn’t you heard? So I won’t be needing a date.”

“Oh dear god,” Lily said faintly.

“And I thought it might be terribly disappointing for you and all,” James blathered on, “to have to go without me, but now you’re all taken care of!”

Lily stared up at James in horror, while James grinned as though this entire thing was going according to plan.

“I hope you didn’t pick anybody with emotional issues though,” James added after a moment, “because they might be a bit put out when you drop them to come to the after-party with me.”

Lily let out a shriek before James could make any other statements with the phrase ‘put out’ in them.

“I don’t BELIEVE you!” she said. “How on EARTH can YOU be the BAND?!”

“The other one cancelled you see,” James explained helpfully, “just now, and Remus told McGonagall…”

“Remus!” Lily’s eyes narrowed. “He caused all this, just wait until I get my hands on him.”

“Wow,” James said, eyes wide.

“What?” Lily asked warily.

“You’re coming with me to the after-party, you can’t wait to get your hands on Remus…” James grinned at her, stars in his eyes. “Lily, you’re our first fangirl!”

“I WANT TO GET MY HANDS ON REMUS SO I CAN CHOKE THE LIFE OUT OF HIM!” Lily jumped to her feet and screamed in his face, eyes squeezed shut with fury. “AND I’M NOT GOING WITH YOU ANYWHERE!”

“Not like that you aren’t,” James commented, taking in her outfit at a glance. “Are your dressrobes blue this year, by any chance? Blue looks best with my hair.”

Lily choked out something unintelligible that started with “Rip off” and ended in “wanker”, and there were lots of adjectives in between which James didn’t really catch while he was daydreaming of after-parties, and some verbs he wasn’t quite familiar with as well.

“If you’ll excuse me,” Lily said at last, drawing deep breaths very slowly, “I have to go murder a Prefect just now.”

“Yes yes, wonderful, Evans,” James snapped out of his reverie and patted her on the shoulder. “Glad we got that all hammered out, blue, don’t forget, and I’ll see you later!”

James strode up the boys’ stairs before Lily could get another word past her rage-constricted throat.

A moment later, Remus came in through the portrait hole, preoccupied with reading a parchment.

“Hullo, Lils,” he said, barely glancing up, then doing a double take at her heaving chest and nearly purple face. “What on earth is the matter?”

“REMUSLUPINKILLYOU!” Lily roared before she barreled into him like a freight train.

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